The Last three years

At times its hard to believe its been three years.  Three years since I heard my baby girl make her first cry, three years since I was wheeled into that OR not knowing what the future held for her, three years since I watched by baby girl with IV's in her head, hand and foot, three year since I had to drive back and forth from the hospital to home just to see my baby girl, three years since I had to ask to hold my daughter, three years since I heard those stupid machines beep everytime someone breathed near her.  And THREE years since doctors told me she would crawl late, walk late, develope late and be way behind.  BOY, has she proved them wrong.  From the minute she was born she proved doctors WRONG.  This girl is fiesty, determined and is NEVER GIVING UP.  She keeps me on my toes, but there isn't a thing in the world I wouldn't do for her.  Her big brown eyes glow and I love just staring at them.  She is beautiful inside and out and I am so proud to call her MINE.

It was Mother's Day three years ago that I told Bob I didn't know how much longer I would make it in my pregnancy.  I was in pain and I couldn't walk.  Then I got admitted to the hospital that following day for what felt like a lifetime.  The next two days went so slow.  I cried so many tears, so many prayers were said and my miracle fought HARD.

Its hard to believe NOW that she was that small, yet she wasn't that small, if that makes sense.  She weighed 6lbs 8oz and she was 6 weeks early.  She was the biggest baby in the NICU.  When we took her home she was 5lbs 3oz and so teeny to me.  Oh how I would go back to that day.  I wouldn't rush it, I would love on that baby and never regret a single moment (not that I do).  I feel like I was cheated of Lexi's first 3 months of life.  Between being in the hospital and Bob being super sick, she has grown up before my eyes.

She endured so much in her first year of life.  Swine flu, heart condition, RSV, heart condition, many tests, tubes and heart condition.  I think she seen more specialists in her first year of life than I've seen in my life.  But once again, she overcame it all.

Lexi,

I can't believe how much you have changed, you get more beautiful everyday.  You have beautiful hair, most days I am jealous of how thick and beautiful your hair is.

This year you have shown us so much.  How intelligent you are.  You are curious about everything and always have to learn the hard way. 

 

I wish I could keep you small forever, but I know I can't.  These last three years have been so fun even through the hard times you have taught me so much.

I love you baby girl, everything about you, how stubborn you are, determined, spunky, girly and how you never ever GIVE UP. 

Love you to the moon and back a million, billion times.

Can't wait to see what the next year bring....