I think about everything he has missed out on and I wonder if he is ashamed of the way he lived his life. Or does he even know what he has missed?
Well I set my feelings aside this past week when I went to visit his grave for the first time ever in my life. Tears strolled down my face under my sunglasses as I talked to my kids about death and Ashton said "Why did he die?" Its hard, hard to explain to a 6 year old, I remember my Dad telling me the story when I asked the same question. I said "Sometimes people don't realize what they have done until its too late Ashton and when you are older, we'll talk!"
We sat around his grave, it was all by itself near a tree, I looked around and seen people from the 1800's and early 1900's. And there was my Grandpa, the man I never got to meet, died at such a young age and had so much life to live. Most of the people surrounding him died at war, died really old or lived a good long life. But not my Grandpa, he died at the young age of 47.
And even though all these years I've gone with unanswered question, I still have a spot of love in my heart for the man I never knew.
Until we meet someday!!