Tuesday, June 19, 2012

3 years

It was three years ago today that our lives changed forever.  Sometimes I sit back and think about what we went through in those two months after Bob was diagnosed and I wonder how we made it.  I found the perfect quote on Pinterest though.

I think this totally fits everything from that year.  The year that looking back now I think changed my life for the better.  Although I would've never said that in 2009, I do believe it today.  Things happen in life for a reason and how you choose to handle them is what matters.  I would never wish what happened to Bob and I on anyone.  I would never want someone to have to be sick to their stomach, not eat, not sleep for a year straight knowing that your Husband could die at any minute.  Never EVER would I wish it on someone.

This day 3 years ago, I walked into a room not thinking anything at all and left feeling hurt, sick, sad and worried for my future.  Bob basically said "Sierra, if my life is over, it is and there is nothing I can do about that, this is all in Gods hands!"  At that time I couldn't believe he would say something like that to me, I couldn't believe my Husband was telling me that it was okay for him to die.  But I see what he meant today.  When you are told your going to die or your spouse is going to die, there is nothing that can make it better.  I don't think I slept for two months straight.  I kept thinking how my life was going to play out, how our life was going to play out, what I would do without my Husband, the Man I married and planned to spend the rest of my life with. 

And today, we are stronger, have a better outlook on life, we don't take the small things for granted, we work hard for what we have and we have worked VERY HARD to be where we are today.  We went from the not knowing what the future would bring to happier today than we ever have been.

I've learned a lot along the way, not to judge others, I was arrogant, didn't really understand why people did things they did or got into situations they did.  I learned a huge lesson about preparing for your future.  I learned that the smallest things are the greatest blessings.  I learned your life can change in a blink of an eye.  I've learned who my true friends are and I've gained many a long the way. 

We have a accomplished a lot in the last year and I am proud of where we are.  I wouldn't change anything, because everything happens for a reason.  I can't believe its been 3 years, life moves so quickly.

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