I have had one CRAZY month. So I started working four ten hour shifts about two weeks ago and I love it, I love being able to spend time with my boys and having a three day weekend. What REALLY sucks is that I wake up at 4:30, get ready, wake the boys up in a hurry, rush out the door to drop the boys off at my Mom's and be to work at 6am. THIS HAS BEEN SO EXHAUSTING!!! I get off at 4:30 and have to fight traffic to get home and I hate traffic, I hate traffic so bad that I always take back roads to get out of having to sit in one place for 10 mins...IT SUCKS!!!! By the time I get home, the boys are wanting dinner, I am wanting to take a shower, give the boys a bath and just relax...BUT, that doesn't happen. I love the 3-day weekends and I look forward to it every week, but I keep asking myself if its really worth it.
Then to add to it, I have had no one to watch my kids for the month of August from 11-2:30, my Grandma is out of town for the month. My boys have NEVER been watched my anyone outside of my family, so I have the hardest time when my family isn't available doing anything. So a girl at work said that her daughter would watch my boys. I was so nervous, not because I didn't trust the girl, because I really did or she wouldn't have been watching my kids. I was nervous because my Boys can be bratts and I hate having other people deal with them. Then Ashton throws a BIG HUGE screaming bloody murder fit when the girl comes over to meet us and I am feeling horrible. Ashton is a big time Mommy's boy, he loves his Mommy and his Grandma, he has a hard time adjusting to NEW things or a new enviroment. So the girl comes to my house the first day and my Mom drops them off and she calls me and I just lose it. I feel so bad for leaving my boys with other people and I don't know why I am that way, its weird. I was worried the whole first day, but they did GREAT and no worries!!! I of course, called every other hour the first couple of days, but they were always laughing and giggling in the background.
Then, tomorrow is Jon's Birthday, Jon is my Best Friends Sons Dad who was killed in Afaghanastan in July. This has been a long hard month for my friend, but she is slowly doing better. Tomorrow is going to be a rough day though, I just ask that everyone say an extra prayer for her and her son. Its so hard to watch a friend go through this, we are in the car laughing one minute and then a song comes on the next minute and she is crying. The craziest things catch her off guard, and this has been a rough road for me too, I have worried about her non-stop and its been rough, because you can find the right words to say...I am sorry just isn't cutting anymore. I just hope that as each day goes by she realizes that it will get better and that she has so much here on earth and that Jon is watching over her and Jase.
2 comments:
Every time I get feeling sorry for myself I remember your friend, and how hard that would be. Thank you for the reminder that I have alot to be grateful for. As for other people watching your kids I feel the exact same way I am always worried that my kids are driving them crazy, it is just more comforting knowing a family member is watching them who love them no matter what temper tantrums and all. Good luck with the new job and sitter and I hope tommorow goes okay for your friends, she is in my thoughts.
Oh you have been having a crazy month. You are right the 3 day weekend would be nice, but it probably doesn't feel like it comes fast enough. You are so cute, although I am the same way with Carson. I have never left him with anyone other than family either. Its hard. Hang in there friend.
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