Its been six months since I made this huge change in my life. I have good days and bad days. I have days where I feel like I could pack up everything and never look back. This is a rollercoaster ride. Holidays are hard and I find myself spending the whole day crying if I don't do anything.
I don't hate Texas, but I don't love it. I miss home. But I can't figure out if I miss home because I miss my normal routine or if I miss it because my FAMILY is there. I think its a combination and I'm leaning towards the family part more. I miss seeing my Mom and Dad pretty much everyday. I miss my mountains STILL. I miss Saturdays with my Sister even if all we did was run around to stores and bought NOTHING.
Everything is so much bigger here and I still feel lost. I'm trying really hard to make the best of things, but I don't know how long I'll be here. Life without my family is hard. I have my family of five, but not having my kids grow up near their grandparents is hard. Daily Lexi says she wants to go home. Just last week while driving to Oklahoma, she said "Mommy, lets just keep going to Utah!" Oh how bad I wanted to, but I didn't. The boys have been in Utah for two weeks now and its been so hard without them. I'm working on keeping myself busy with projects. Getting everything organized. My Step-daughter will be here in 17 days and that'll help with time.
I keep thinking about Thanksgiving and Christmas coming up and wondering how we'll survive it. I know we'll get through it, just like we have the last 6 months.
We just continue to keep ourselves busy and take it one day at a time.