Feeling optimistic and a new blog

Its been a week! I hate being stressed and I hate even more being depressed. When I get depressed I tend to have emotions about everything. Everything comes out of me and I have so many frustrations. On Tuesday shortly after I wrote my last post I contacted a heart Mom who is very experienced in the heart world. She is so sweet, she talked to me for a long time on Monday night, it sure was a relief to finally be able to talk with someone who knows how I feel and not think that I am completely insane. I am new to this whole thing, I am not sure what is bad and was isn't and I am not really all that educated on Lexi's heart condition. I just don't know, I think somewhere between Ogden Regional and Primary Childrens, things fell out and I was left out of the loop. I've been frustrated lately because all the questions I have are being answered by Lexi's pediatrician because when I went to Primarys, I didn't think things were bad, I thought it was something that would heal on its own and all would be good. Well I was wrong and I guess I learned a lesson. So I have my list of questions for the cardiologist and I plan on making my next visit and very long and educated one. Yesterday I called her cardiologist to find out what I should do about all my concerns, they didn't call back and so I called again today and was a little frustrated. I let this lady know all my frustrations and that I am worried, and I am still waiting for a phone call back. So we will see what happens, I realize her appt is less than 2 weeks away, but what if 2 weeks is too long, I just don't know.

A new blog, I have decided to make Lexi her own blog, I see all the heart Mom's have their own for their heart babies and I would like to focus more on all of my family on this blog which will be linked to Lexi's blog. So if you would like to connect to Lexi's blog, the link is http://alexiasjourney.blogspot.com/. That way I can update all my family, friends and other fellow heart Mom's on the progress and life of my little girl.

I questioned myself all day Monday and Tuesday on why God would give me a baby with special needs, but I think I found my answer. Lexi is truly a blessing, everything about her is. She makes me smile everyday, she is a happy baby, never cries, she loves her Mommy and I truly believe God knew what he was doing when he gave her to me. I feel lucky to tell the truth and although we may have a tough road ahead of us, I will learn so much and be thankful for this sweet and loving little baby girl.

Thanks to everyone for all the support, people have no clue how blessed I feel to have so many people who care and continue to watch out for us or pray for us. This is hard, I won't lie and any Mom who has went through this trial knows. I also feel good about it, I have made new friendships. Thanks Shauntelle for reassuring that miracles do happen, your little girl is a true miracle and I feel so honored to be able to talk and communicate with you.